Leapfrogging hustlers

I’ve been on a Weeds marathon lately. If you haven’t seen the show, it’s the one on Showtime where Mary Louise Parker plays Nancy Botwin, a suburban widow turned weed dealer. The job keeps her family in her cookie-cutter neighborhood, Agrestic, until season four when she moves closer to Mexico to open a maternity store. Of course, the store is a front to cover the real business of smuggling drugs and immigrants.

Nancy Botwin is a hustler and a mom. She’s doing what she has to do so she can do what she wants to do. Now, what does all this have to do with you and me? Am I suggesting we start a ring of hustlin’ mamas? No, not exactly.

But the idea of doing one legit business in order to support your less than practical passion as an artist is something I am suggesting. And rather than calling it hustling, I’m calling this concept leapfrogging. Why? Because putting a name to a concept makes it easier to digest and remember. And because Leapfrogging Hustlers is my new band name. Just joking.

In Nancy’s case, her leapfrog is a maternity store she runs during the day in order to maintain a civilized living, while still pursuing her thrill for illegal activities on the down low. In my case, or in the case of artistic folks or parents who must maintain a less-than-glamorous occupation in order to say, pay bills, we can glean a little something from Lady Botwin. NOT AS DRUG DEALERS. But as artists or musicians, or people who just want to have a freakin’ life outside of the cubicle.

So, for example, you work as an accountant/chef/hairdresser/lawyer to put food on the table, but you pursue your passion as an artist or musician on the side. That is until hopefully that side job becomes your main job and you can tell your boss to suck it. Hence the leapfrog, you bounce off one job for the other.

Or, you can continue to leapfrog indefinitely if you don’t care to pursue your hobby as a knitter, musician or skull bedazzler for a living. (I actually saw some bedazzled skulls at an arts festival over the weekend…) I know plenty of people who save their hobbies for the weekends and don’t care to take them out of the garage. That’s great. That’s called life balance, and it’s something we all want.

But I also know plenty of people who dream to make a living doing what they love, whether it’s photography, music, or writing, and they’re working in jobs that they hate, or they’re in jobs that are flexible but not financially lucrative and definitley not listed on the Top Ten Careers on Forbes. Case in point, the waiter/model/actor in LA or the bartender/songwriter in Nashville. And the older we get (or the more mouths we have to feed), the more we start to wonder if leapfrogging is ok or if we should just give up the dream and settle down in a cubicle or go back to school for one of those top 10 in demand jobs.

My answer to all this is, leapfrog however you see fit. It’s all good as long as you’re making enough money and you’re able to pursue what matters to you. As I said in Check Yo Self, your bills don’t care how they are paid.

I recently listened to a Pine Magazine interview with the Atlanta-based band Today the Moon, Tomorrow the Sun, and the members were talking about how they play music and keep day jobs. Two of them are married and work as hairdressers a few days a week so they can tour the east coast with ease. When I worked in a hair salon, I found that many hair sylists and make-up artists are also writers, actors, and musicians. People sometimes assume stylists are just “not college-material.” Not true. They’re typically super creative people who are fiercely independent and often ADD. Sitting at a desk all day is their worst nightmare. I also know people who work for the school system so they can tour in the summer. I know, it brings a whole new meaning to RHOTS. And now that working from home is becoming more common, people like me can do freelance writing (read: boring writing jobs) for money and then blog for the love of comments.

It doesn’t really matter how you leapfrog or what your civilian job is or how old you are while doing said civilian job: what matters is that your bills are paid, your children (or your pets) are fed, and you have the flexibilty to live the creative lifestyle that makes you happy. So rather than see your life as straddling the practical on one hand and the dream on the other, maybe reframe it as a practical means to a fantastical end.

My bff Melissa is a very good example of a leapfrogging hustler. She lives in New Jersey, just a bus ride away from NYC. She doesn’t have kids, but she does have three cats to feed. When we were at a high school reunion last Christmas catching up with some bitches we probably never liked, one of them asked her what she does for a living. Here’s what my brilliant friend said,

“I work a crap job in New Jersey, but I make enough money to live on my own, and I can go to NYC anytime I want to go shopping and see shows.”

Amen. Call it leapfrogging or hustling or living the dream. Doesn’t matter. As long as you’re living it, consider yourself one more person living a life without regret. And sometimes that is better than monetary success, good reviews, or even positive virtual feedback.